The TRUTH about pregnancy!

I'm not saying pregnancy is awful. (Okay sometimes I say that, but that's because I can be a little dramatic!) But people talk about pregnancy in these dreamy, whimsical terms - about the miracle of a person growing inside you, the incomparable joy of feeling your baby kick and move, the wonder of hearing the heartbeat and seeing the ultrasounds. Those are all true (well, I haven't felt Bean kick yet, but I imagine it will be out of this world). But they don't talk about the bloody noses, bleeding gums, weird gastrointestinal activity, unbelievable fatigue, unparalleled dietary stress, or itchy body parts. Sure, there's the typical warnings about moodiness and freaky food cravings but honestly, that's no big deal when you compare it with all the other unadvertised "side effects." (And, while I've gone through phases of absolutely NEEDING an entire kosher dill pickle several times a week, and obsessing over Yogurtland, I haven't had any of those cravings for absurd combinations like chocolate covered escargot.)

Books like What to Expect When You're Expecting tell you all about how these annoying symptoms are "normal." Don't worry, they write, this is completely normal. As if that makes it less of a pain in the neck. "I'm not worried," I want to yell, "I'm irritated!" That, and the fact that no one reads these books and websites unless they're already preggers - too late! It's like telling someone who just took a bite of too-hot pizza, "Careful, you might burn your mouth." Uh, thanks for the warning. (Actually some people who are TTC - dumb lingo for Trying To Conceive - read these books before they're pregnant I suppose. But these folks conveniently fail to tell the rest of the general public these pregnancy secrets, too.)

Well I'm here to tell the TRUTH. While pregnancy is definitely amazing and awe-striking, and there are parts of it that make all this junk worth it (especially the having the baby part of it, haha), it's not the picnic those dreamy-eyed romantics would have you believe.

For example, pregnancy gives you a superhuman bionic sense of smell. Some may consider this a blessing (they're wrong). And I suppose back in evolutionary history, it was useful being able to sniff out the differences between poisonous and palatable berries, predators and prey. But seeing as how we're no longer hunter-gatherers, this uncanny ability to sniff out the fact that my neighbor six houses down is using ginger in her stir-fry is pretty useless to say the least. I can smell ingredients in the neighborhood dinners, the sweat on unsuspecting strangers ten feet away, cigarette smoke left on someone's clothes from two puffs taken hours ago, and dog poop left behind by irresponsible dog-walkers half a block down. Sure I can smell really great things better too - walking into the lobby of the Ali'i Tower at the Hilton this morning I could smell gardenias. Someone had used gardenia scented lotion in the bathroom - around the corner and through a closed door. I can smell onion rings grilling at Tropics Restaurant near the beach - from the Diamond Head Apartments where our office is, at least two hundred yards away and behind two towers. Even good smells are unbelievably overwhelming. But don't worry. This is totally normal.

They say this is not only normal, but will last till I give birth. I'm considering Botox for my nostrils.

Speaking from the Heart!

We had another appointment on Tuesday, just a check-up. Everything's going great - including my slow and steady weight gain! Haha. My doctor is a weight Nazi. Anyway, we got to hear the heartbeat again, and this time we were prepared! Alex recorded it on his iPhone and below is a clip of it. It's a lot slower than the first time we heard it, which is normal, now that the brain and nervous system is actually regulating the rhythm - no more spastic beats. Enjoy - we did!

Update, genetic screening, and ultrasound

I went for genetic screening today. Unfortunately the appointment time got a little messed up and Alex wasn't able to come for this one. We were both pretty disappointed. My mom came instead and I'm so glad she was there!

Below is a video of pictures captured during the screening and a couple video clips. This was the first part of what they call sequential screening, where they take a bunch of measurements of the baby and also take a blood sample from me, to determine risk factors for certain genetic defects (Down's Syndrome, Trisomy 18, and open neural tube defects). Based on the measurements they took today everything looks good. We have another appointment on November 9th, where they'll draw another sample of blood from me (and have another look at Bean), and once the blood test results are back from both screenings we'll have a 93-95% accurate diagnosis of whether we're at risk for any of these three defects. We'll also get to find out the gender at that appointment! (Some of the pictures look like they might reveal something but they don't.)

Based on the measurements, as of today Bean is a little over three inches long from crown to rump. Bean sure was putting on a show today! Wiggling, swimming around, even "jumping" - pushing the legs out pretty forcefully! It was amazing to see in such detail the five fingers, leg bones, ribs, even the little developing brain. We heard the heartbeat again which was the most incredible part, and at 158 beats per minute, Bean's little heart is growing strong!

To be honest it was a relief to see and hear it for myself again. Since our last "emergency" appointment three and a half weeks ago where we just heard the heartbeat, and our last ultrasound way before that, and since Bean's too little for me to feel movement yet, I've been a bit anxious for "proof" that everything's still okay. They say you worry about your kids no matter how old they get - they don't tell you that worrying about them starts before they're even born!

It doesn't help that I had another (more severe) dizzy spell at work earlier this week. This time my hearing completely disappeared as the black spots started appearing in front of my eyes, and my coordination was even worse (I couldn't put a cap back on a highlighter, I was making typos all over the place as I struggled to finish a reservation, and when I finally left the kiosk I pretty much staggered to the bathroom like a drunk person). I sat on the cold bathroom floor again until the feeling went away, and was transferred to a less demanding, cooler position for the remainder of the day, but I still felt "off" for almost an entire day after that.

But regardless, Bean's doing great, and that's what matters! This is still so surreal...