Growing so fast!

Dear Isabella,

I owe you so many letters! Oh boy, baby, life has been moving at such a fast pace - and so has your growth and development!

You became three months old recently - on July 7th! THREE months old! Where did time go? When you were just weeks old and I was struggling not to lose my mind from the lack of sleep and not knowing at all what I was doing, everyone told me, it gets better, she's going to grow up too fast, time flies! I thought they were nuts. But they were more than right. It seems like a lifetime ago that you were sleeping in the bassinet wherever we put you - next to our bed, in the living room, you name it. Back then you drank your bottles in such a hurry, and now you usually take your time and sometimes it's even hard to get you to focus and finish your meal!

You had your second set of shots too. Those were not nearly as hard for you as the first set. We gave you Tylenol right away, for one thing, and also the ones you had this time tend to have less difficult reactions. Whew!

In just the past couple of weeks you've hit some milestones that for us, are amazingly significant! Now you're able to grab things on purpose, with both hands - and you sure do it a lot. You love sitting in your bouncer because the toys that hang above you are in reaching distance. This is also why your swing has become your second favorite (as opposed to your very very favorite like before) place to play. The toys that hang from that you only can look at. But your most favorite toy of all is the little ball Daddy and I bought for you from Thinker Toys! It looks like this except it's blue and pink:

This ball helped you really really learn to grab and hold, grab and let go, grab and lift, and lately you have been just completely determined to find a way to fit that whole ball in your mouth. Never mind that it is the size of your head! In fact you are getting so good at grabbing things and picking them up on purpose that yesterday you actually picked up your own pacifier and tried to put it back in your mouth! Daddy and I took you to Zippy's so we could have some lunch, and you spit out your pacifier into your lap. You looked at it, picked it up, and kept trying to put it in your mouth. Well you couldn't quite aim it and kept ending up with your fist in your mouth instead (another favorite) but it was still fun to watch you start trying this new trick!

You're really good at sitting up! We still have to hold you up but your neck is so strong and your balance is really good too. You also love when we hold you up in a standing position. You are such a strong girl!

You have also discovered that your hands and feet actually belong to YOU! You absolutely love pulling on your own toes. And sometimes I see you holding your hand in front of your face, watching it wiggle and move like you're figuring out all the stuff your hands can do. My favorite thing you do with your hands is still when you hold my fingers, though. When you're having your bottle, you usually grip my finger or thumb, or one with each hand - and you hang on super tight! I love it. Sometimes you're tired at the end of the day but you aren't quite ready for bed. So you just like to hang out, sitting on my lap or lying in your crib, holding my finger.

Yup, I said lying in your crib. We moved you into your own room, big girl! First we moved your bassinet in there, and you still slept in the bassinet. But after a couple nights we put you to bed in your crib and you never once complained! It's so great that you are making these transitions so easily - I think it was harder for me than for you! The first couple of nights, I felt lonely when I went to bed. But Daddy moved your rocking chair into your room, and an old comfortable chair I had from when I lived by myself. So now you have all kinds of comfy things in your room! And we feed you in the rocking chair and we have your bed time routine completely figured out.

Around 7:30 (sometimes earlier or later depending on how tired you are), I start your bath. After your bath you have your last bottle for the night. At the end of the bottle you are sleepy but not asleep yet, so I swaddle you (still) and sometimes I rock you, if you need it. But sometimes I just put you in the crib and you drift off on your own. Usually by the time 8:30 rolls around you are sound asleep. Speaking of swaddling, usually by the time you wake up in the morning, you've managed to get at least one if not both of your arms out, and usually your right leg is also out. It's pretty funny actually. And you're getting better about not knocking out your own pacifier. But without swaddling you still wake yourself up every hour or so, so we're going to keep doing it till you don't need it and you don't want it. That's what the doctor said - you will let us know when to stop. With the swaddle you sleep till about 5:30 every morning - that's NINE hours straight! Sometimes you wake up around 3 or 4, but you just want your pacifier and you're back asleep before I'm even outside your room. I don't mind waking up to do that once or twice a night, especially since it's not every night.

I love watching you sleep. Your long, long eyelashes rested on your soft skin, with your chubby cheeks and sweet little mouth. When I look at you sleeping I wish I could gather you up and sleep with you like you were my teddy bear, that's how cute you are.

You're also smiling and talking so much now! Sometimes you squeal and shriek like you're experimenting with what kind of sounds you can make. You also have been making this weird growling-grunting noise lately. At first we thought you were trying to poop! But I think you're just loving that you can make all kinds of noises.

You get so much attention when we go out. Maybe I'm just being a big-headed mommy, but I think people tell us how pretty and cute (and the phrase "perfect looking" has been used by multiple strangers) more than with other babies! People really think you are so charming! They also tell us how good you are, if they spend any time with us at all. You are so mellow when we go out and people are amazed at how you'll just sit there and be totally happy watching everything. We had a meeting with our photographers for our wedding yesterday, and it was over an hour long! We were at Starbucks and you were totally happy just sitting there the whole time - some of the time in your carrier, and some time on Daddy's lap, and finally you ended up on my lap - where you fell asleep. You really are such an easy-going kid in a lot of ways. You still get overstimulated sort of easily but at three months that's normal. Also you get overheated a little more easily than other babies, but not like when you were a newborn!

I'm so proud of you, my little angel. My favorite time of day is bath and bed time. It's like our private, sweet, together time. I love watching you go from excited and playful to calm, content, and relaxed. It makes me feel good to be able to help you feel good.

More changes are coming to our lives, my baby! You'll have Daddy around more - he is leaving Senor Frogs to work for Atlantis as the cruise manager on the Navatek I. That's where I used to work. Daddy's new job will be much less hours than at Senor Frog's. But hopefully he can still keep in touch and keep hanging out with his friends from Frogs because those uncles sure do love you! Especially Uncle Anwar and Uncle Chavo. Mommy will have a new job soon too! I'm leaving Atlantis Submarines to work at UHA Health. Hopefully this will be a place Mommy can stay at for a long time and make a good regular daily and weekly routine for you. That way also I'll be off on the weekends which is important when you start school.

School seems like a loooooong way off, but at the rate time is passing, it will feel like no time at all! Don't grow up too fast my sweet pea. I want to savor each and every moment of your baby-hood. Each little change and milestone and development of your personality. That's part of why I haven't been blogging as much - I'm too busy making sure I am in the moment with you whenever we are together, so I can remember all the little details and all the wonderful feelings you give me. But I should get better about it again - I have to write everything down so I can remember forever!

I love you, Isabella. More than anything in the world and everything in the world all put together.

Love love love,
Mommy

TRUTH (You thought I forgot, didn't you?)

So now that it's almost three (three?!) months since I gave birth, I think it's time to revisit that ugly thing called TRUTH - more specifically, the truth about POST-pregnancy. Be forewarned - this can get gross.

The "lochia" bleeding they tell you about is nothing like a period. It's like an ellipsis. (For those unfamiliar, that's the dot-dot-dot.) An ellipsis in font size 48. Luckily at the hospital they give you these enormous pads that make Depends look like Poise panty-liners, and if you get the heads-up (this is your heads-up) you can be sneaky and put four more in your overnight bag every time you change the one you're wearing so you can keep telling the nurse you need more, and then when you go home, you'll have all the extra you need. You'll need lots of extra.

Here's one good thing, though. As soon as you check in when you're in labor, they make you change out of your clothes (wait, the good part is coming) and they give you these disposable panties. "Uh, where's the good part?" you ask. That is the good part. These disposable panties are SO comfortable you wonder WHY someone doesn't market them and sell them at Walgreens. The nurse hands them to you and you look at her like, "What is that?" But they are the most perfect combination of tight enough to hold that ginormous pad in place and stretchy enough that there is NO binding or creasing. It's like a hug for your bottom from your fat aunt - perfectly firm yet squishy. These too, you can stock up on if you strategerize, since they're supposed to be disposable.

But I'm just getting started.

When they say you won't sleep because of the feedings and the diapers and the blahblahblah, you can't quite wrap your mind around that fact until you're a week in and you feel like you just might die (and then you think, "Well at least I'll be asleep then..."). They don't tell you that feeding her every two or three hours means: 6AM wake up, change diaper, start feed. Feed till 6:20 maybe, if your baby suckles frantically as if you never feed her. Rock until 6:45AM, baby is FAST asleep, mouth agape, limbs limp. 6:45 and 35 seconds, put baby into cradle, mouth agape, limbs limp. 6:46AM fall into bed exhausted, but unable to fall asleep instantly because there is so much racing through your mind (SleepNowBeforeSheWakesUp-Laundry-ShouldIShowerNow-GottaShaveMyLegs-SleepNowDammit-OhCrapDidIFeedTheCatThisWeek-SeriouslySleepRightNOW-OhYeahI'mKindaHungry-NahIt'sOkay-GoToSleep!). 6:48AM baby startles awake - rock again until 7:06AM and think about the fact that two months ago you thought waking up for work was tough. 7:07AM gingerly put baby back in her cradle and force yourself to lie down with your eyes closed even if you can't sleep, and then end up sleeping. Until 8AM when you wake up to do it all over again. And even then, you're excited that you got almost a full hour of sleep.

It gets better, and it gets better pretty fast actually. But at the time you really do think to yourself, "What was I thinking?" And then you think that you are a terrible person and the worst Mommy ever just for thinking that, as if feeling overwhelmed and desperate automatically means you also feel regret (it doesn't). As if feeling a tiny bit of regret means you would take it back (it doesn't, and regret isn't the right word for it anyway). You also find yourself really angry at all the people who told you that "EVERYTHING changes" as if they were supposed to expound on that fact to make you truly comprehend what that means. There is no way to describe how every moment of every day for the rest of your life is now completely changed forever - not just your responsibilities, but also your perspective, your priorities, your freedom (and your perspective on what freedom means), your friends, your interests. Sure, you're going to mostly have the same friends and interests - but somehow everything is just different. Some things will be much more interesting than you ever thought possible (to me it was poop, for example) and other things will just seem boring (like my old hobby - drinking). For me, anyway, that "different" feeling was shocking and terrifying. If you're anything like me, you might feel a little grief for the life you didn't even realize you were saying goodbye to - and if you're like me, you may mistake this grief for a feeling of regret or a feeling that you want that old life back instead, and then feel an immense and intense feeling of guilt for that. But mourning your "old life" does not mean you want a do-over - it's just that such a significant change can be hard to adjust to no matter how mentally prepared you thought you were - especially when you're getting no sleep.

So, throughout pregnancy you're thinking, "Oh God I'm this hulking monstrous waddling flesh-ball, I can't wait to be normal-sized again." And people tell you that you won't shrink back to prepregnancy size magically. And you can accept that. But what they don't tell you is that you deflate like a balloon, slowly and lopsidedly (and sometimes just as noisily...) but you have been stretched beyond imagination in so many places and unless you're 14 your skin is not as elastic as a balloon. If you are fortunate enough to have a Sugar-Nazi for an ob/gyn like I was, and if you breastfeed even just for a couple weeks, your belly will mostly deflate pretty quickly. But you'll be left with gross skin that seems darker than before (not tan, just darker) and also wrinkled and saggy like an old elephant's butt. You'll be glad to see your ankles do in fact still have bones, as do your feet, but then you'll realize your thighs look still-pregnant when contrasted above thin-again ankles even when separated by knees and calves. That linea negra that could have been called a badge of honor now just looks gross and uneven. And if you breastfeed, then ten seconds after you stop breastfeeding (if you're lucky this will be MUCH later when all these other things have probably resolved themselves) your boobs will NOT return to pre-pregnancy size and shape. They will be decidedly lower, flatter, and sadder. Your butt will shrink but not back to its cute round self - it will just deflate and become that flat but wide "mom-butt."

You may also find yourself wanting to spit in the face of anyone who tries to say the K-word (K...egel) around you.

There's more, but I think that's a decent dose of truth, at least for now. But you know what. This is cliche, but, it's all worth it. When you look at your baby sleeping (you always love them most when they're sleeping) and you take the time to notice little things like how her toes wiggle almost constantly even in her sleep, and you stop and think about the fact that very, very soon, she will be a little person with opinions, questions, hopes and fears, you know that even if each day is a challenge it is a challenge you want to cherish and relish and remember.

And that is the most important truth of all.

10 (Thousand) Things I Love About You

Dear Isabella,

Here are some reasons I am smitten with you: The way you rest your hands politely folded on your round tummy when you fall asleep on my lap. Your tiny balled up fists held so tightly at the beginning of your 4am feeding that slowly unclench as you fall asleep. Your long, long eyelashes. Your brown hair that has a hint of red in the sunlight. Your funny toes that curl around my finger like monkey feet. Your chubby, rosy cheeks. Your red red lips and little triangle mouth that falls open when you're sleeping really deeply. When you hold my pinky finger so tightly as I'm feeding you. Your beautiful eyes that look so round and serious sometimes and light up with your coy smile other times. The way you try to put both your fists in your mouth at once. The determined and concentrated look on your face when you're trying so hard to coordinate your hands. Your little tongue licking your hands. Your tiny grunts and sighs when you're sleeping. Your strong little voice when you're talking to your toys. Your soft pink skin and little creases in your chubby arms and legs. The peaceful way you sleep resting your head on my shoulder when you fall asleep when I'm trying to burp you. The sleepy half-closed eyes you have when I wake you up. The sound of your soft little snores. The way your eyes get SO BIG and wide when the lights get dimmer suddenly. Your little facial expressions when you're dreaming. The specific combination of smells from your baby soap, fresh diaper, and milk that make me want to snuggle you like a Teddy bear. The dimples on your fists where your knuckles should be.

These are the things that make me say, Wow...what an angel.

I love you!

Love,
Mommy

Shots!

Dear Isabella,

Last Tuesday you had your two month "birthday" and so on Thursday you had your two month old doctor's appointments. You grew a lot! You're eleven pounds, 12.5 ounces and 22.75 inches long! You're still in the 75th percentile for weight and between 50-75th percentile for height.

You also had your first shots that day. Poor little girl. You had two shots, one in each thigh. You were happily wiggling on the exam table and I made Daddy be the one to hold you down, and I just stood in the corner. You had no idea what was coming of course. The way you cried was so awful! Different than any other cry before - a shocked, scared, painful cry. But you're such a good girl - you stopped crying almost right after Daddy picked you up when the nurse was finished. And your cute little bottom lip stuck out. I bet that pouty face won't be so cute when you get to be two or three years old, but for now, it's precious!

Later that night you were so unhappy! You had a little bit of a fever and I think your legs were sore where you got the shots, so every time you moved your legs it made it worse. But of course you didn't understand that and you don't have that much control over your muscles still anyway, so it was so awful for you. I took you to Grandma's house so I would have some help, because Daddy had to go to work. We gave you baby Tylenol and I wrapped you in your swaddle super tight to try and keep your legs from moving too much. After a bottle and some rocking, you finally fell asleep. By the time you woke up for your middle of the night bottle, you seemed to be doing a lot better, and by morning you were back to your cheerful self. But, boy, hearing your terrified painful cries was awful!

You're getting bigger and stronger every day! Which makes it harder when you're wiggling and playing when you're supposed to be having your bottle. But when you're playing it's fun. We got you some new toys that should be good for you to practice grabbing stuff, and a stuffed rattling bug that hangs from your carseat handle. It's soft so it's not dangerous if it comes loose in an accident. You love it! Yesterday in the morning I put you in your carseat while I made your bottles for the day, and you were smiling at it, and talking to it, and staring at it for almost an hour!

Each day with you is a new adventure. I love you!

Love,
Mommy

TWO months old already?!

Dear Isabella,

Tomorrow you'll be two months old! Can you believe it? Neither can I. You are growing up so fast! There are little changes even day to day. 

You sleep for longer, you're eating FIVE ounces at each bottle, and you are SO much more aware of your surroundings! Little milestones are so exciting for your Daddy and me. You can see farther and focus longer, so you watch as we move around the room. You coo and talk to people - and to the animals on your swing! You reach out to bat at the toys hanging from your bouncer. You love tummy time on the boppy - sometimes that's your favorite place to take a nap. Yesterday your Daddy SWORE that while we were in the car you actually picked up your own pacifier out of your lap. I bet it was by mistake, but it's still the first time you actually grabbed something and held on long enough to pick it up. And you've been finding your own fist to suck on lately too. It will be nice when you're able to pick up your pacifier and put it in your own mouth - I think we do that about a hundred times a day for you!

Every morning when I unwrap you from your swaddle, first your right arm gets unwrapped and it goes right up over your head like it was springloaded! Then I unwrap your left arm and that one goes flying up too! Then you arch your back and scrunch your face and moan a little as you streeeeeettttchhh... And then you rub your face a little and squirm around stretching some more. No matter how tired I am it makes me smile. It's one of my favorite parts of our day together.

You've had a lot of visitors this month! In fact, it's like we should have called it Grandparent's Month. First, we finally got everything hooked up for you to talk to your grandma in Mexico - and Abuela was so happy to see you! You also got to see her new puppy, Perlita. Hopefully one day we can get a puppy for you too. We also want you to video chat with Abuela a lot so she can talk to you in Spanish. A lot of the dresses you've been wearing are dresses she sent you. They are all so cute! Abuela has really great baby fashion sense! 

Also, Great Grandma - my mom's mom - came all the way to Hawaii from Wisconsin to meet you! You gave her a whole lot of smiles while she was here. She even stayed over at our house to see a little of our "normal" evening life (admittedly not so exciting - bottle, nap, bath, bottle, swaddle, and goodnight!).

Finally, you got to meet some of your Hilo family. Grandpa and Lola and Aunty Cayla came for the weekend to see you. You smiled at Grandpa A LOT and on Sunday you were talking and talking and talking - more than I'd ever heard you talk in one "session" before!

Your Aunty Sari is in town for our 10 year high school reunion next week, so you met her on Saturday too. She said you're so precious, she might just want a baby of her own! Wow! 

You sure had fun meeting everyone but I think it was an overwhelming weekend for you. You also have your first cold right now so those two things have made you over-tired and just sort of uncomfortable. Your little eyes are all red and watery, and I can hear the congestion in your chest when you breathe, poor little girl. But you're such a trooper. You'll be better in no time!

Oh Bella. I'm so in love with you. When I look at you I still can't believe how perfect you are. Your Daddy and I are so blessed. Now that life is sort of getting into a rhythm it's easier to really savor the little moments with you. And I'm trying to savor each little one as much as possible! I really have to video tape your morning stretch. I kept meaning to record video of you having your bottle because your little gulping, sucking, contented sighing noises, with your expressive eyes and eyebrows were so cute! But now you're focusing on your environment so much that you hardly do that anymore. When we're trying to capture your little habits, we can't procrastinate even one week.

Your two month check-ups are on Thursday. I can't wait to see how tall you got and how much you weigh. You're also going to get your first set of shots. I hope I don't cry! 

I love you, Sweet Pea, and I'm so proud of you. 

Love always,
Mommy

Growing so fast!

Dear Isabella,

You are growing into a little person with a distinct personality so quickly! You're "talking" more, and your little voice is so charming. Hilo Grandpa calls you several times a week to hear your voice and to talk to you - maybe by the time he visits in a couple weeks you'll know his voice.

Just this morning I saw you reaching out towards the things you were looking at - you're still uncoordinated and can't quite aim your hand correctly, but it's still a sign you're learning all about your world!

You've been getting into more of a routine, too. In the mornings, we get up right around when Daddy goes to work and have a bottle, and then we have a little time in the swing. Then you have a short nap, about an hour, until we play some more or have a bath. Then after you have a snack we go out, either to Daddy's office or the mall or to run errands. In the afternoon, after you have a bottle, you have some tummy time and usually you fall asleep for another nap. When you wake up, you have another bottle and about an hour or two later you're asleep again. Sometime in the middle of the night you wake up and have another bottle, and usually you go back to sleep pretty quickly. Depending on the timing, you wake up somewhere around six and Daddy and I struggle to put you back to sleep just one more time to get a couple more hours rest. And then we do it all again!

We finally ordered your announcements yesterday. Not that Facebook and email haven't told the world you're here yet! The photos came out great - Uncle Kevin and Uncle Dean took the pictures for us for free. Thanks Shot55 Photography! We took the pictures on Mother's Day, and then went to Grandma's house for a nice lunch and to spend some time together as a family. It was pretty relaxing for our first Mother's Day. Next year we'll try and go out for an actual Mother's Day brunch!

You're smiling so often, now too! You have a great big smile, and sometimes you even look a little mischievous. Are you going to be a sneaky trouble maker? Your smile actually reminds me of my cousin Carly - when she was a baby she would smile with her whole face, and a wide open mouth!

You are also very serious sometimes, just quietly looking around, studying your surroundings. I think you'll probably be a very smart person, and very curious about everything. There are still times when you struggle to stay awake - as if you just don't want to miss out on anything!

Uhoh! You're awake from your nap - time to play!

Love,
Mommy

Graduations!

Dear Isabella,

As I write this, you are sleeping next to me in your bassinet, swaddled (but of course your right arm has managed to wiggle out) and beautiful. I can't believe that tomorrow you will be one month old! You are graduating from "newborn" to "infant."

In fact you've had a lot of milestones this week. The final bit of your umbilical cord stump (finally!) fell off this morning. So tonight we gave you your first real bath - before this we couldn't get that stump wet (more on that in a bit). You also graduated from diaper size "N" to "1." And in the past two weeks you went from eating 2.5 ounces per feeding every two hours, to eating 4 ounces per feeding every three-ish hours. I think you had a growth spurt in the past few days because you look and feel a lot bigger (and heavier!), and you were certainly extra hungry! Oh, and with all those changes you also have outgrown all your "Newborn" sized onesies - on to the "0-3 Month" size. You're getting big so fast!

And finally, we are getting into an eat-change-sleep routine that more or less works and is fairly predictable. In fact, this week we started a pretty good all-day routine of waking hours, going out hours (even if it's just to visit Daddy at work - it's good for us to get out of the house a little every day), and night time sleep schedule. Life is getting a little easier with this routine and predictability - even if Daddy and I are still very tired all the time!

The only thing that has sort of been a challenge this week is that you're having trouble going "number two" lately. Last week Thursday you hadn't pooped all day until at night you suddenly had a diaper overflowing (literally)! And Friday was the same thing. Saturday we caught it before it got all over you, but that was just by chance. And then on Sunday you had nothing! So I called the doctor on Monday and they told us how to "help" you go. Poor little thing. This whole week we've had to help you. At first it felt so weird to do that to you, but like your Daddy said, we're just helping you feel better. We have a pediatrician appointment on Tuesday so hopefully they'll give us a new solution. Though I hope they don't advise us to change your formula - finally it seems like your gas/spitting up problems have settled down.

Because of those diaper blow outs we had to bathe you even though you still had a little bit of an umbilical stump. They weren't "full" baths with a tub of water, but we had to use running water to get you clean - a sponge bath would not have done the trick! You still aren't sure about how you like the bath. You seem to relax when the water runs over you, but you certainly don't like your head getting wet! Tonight when I washed your hair you cried so hard, and real tears were actually running. I could tell it stressed your Daddy out to see you so unhappy. But you're so cute in your hooded towel afterwards!

We also saw Aunty Maki this week, and baby Mana and Uncle Jin. We walked to meet them in Waikiki to give them some formula that we had that you can't use. It was so cute to see you and Mana "meet" each other - even though both of you weren't really aware of it. Oh gosh, sweetie, Mana was born in January so she's three months older than you, but you two are almost the same size! Mana was born at just over five pounds though, so you had a 3 pound head start! Haha.

Yesterday we also visited other people in Waikiki. We stopped by P.F. Chang's and saw Uncle Adam and Uncle Shane. They both said you are super cute! Uncle Adam has a little baby too, Cole, and I still remember the day he came into Starbucks and told us his wife was pregnant! He was so happy and already proud. Just like your Daddy was when he told his friends. Uncle Shane doesn't have any babies for you to play with, but he said he's going to teach you all about life. (I'm not really sure what that means!)

Finally, we also walked all the way to the Hilton to visit some people at my work. You met your Aunty Yukari who was so excited to meet you! She made one of your diaper cakes for our baby shower (in fact it's her size "1" diapers we're using now). While I was pregnant with you she used to talk to you a lot. She loved you from the start! You also met Uncle Bobby, Uncle Tim, and Aunty Lori. When we got there, Aunty Yukari carried you for a little while and then Aunty Lori carried you the rest of the time. They both said you're so pretty. Aunty Lori kept joking that she wanted to take you home with her. She has a teenage daughter, a little boy, and another little baby boy who is turning one year old soon. We had to go after a little while because you were starting to get too hot - and hungry.

You're starting to pay more attention to what's going on around you - probably partly because you're starting to be able to see a little farther. You love your swing at home and at Grandma and Grandpa's house. You have a book there that's called "How Do I Feel" and it has pictures of kids with different emotions - you like to look at that too. You still love to sleep on top of me or Daddy - and most afternoons that's how you have one of your naps. Now that you're able to sleep in your bassinet and you aren't so insistent on sleeping on top of us, it's really nice to have you do that for a little while every day. It feels nice to see you so relaxed and content - and to know that it's because you're close to us and feel safe with us.

You're growing so fast, Bean! Pretty soon you'll be too big for your bassinet and you'll have to sleep in your own room. I can't believe how much you've already grown and matured - when I look at pictures of you when you were just days old, I am so amazed! You are prettier and prettier every day, even though every day I don't think you can get any prettier than you already are! Sometimes I look at you and I am still blown away that you're ours. That we made you. You're my daughter. I don't know if I'll ever stop being in awe of that.

What will the next couple of weeks bring us? More milestones, more growing, maybe some new challenges (I don't think that will ever change! It's part of being a parent!) and definitely some more great experiences.

Congratulations on your One Month Birthday, my Isabella. I am so proud of you every moment, and I love you so much!

Love,
Mommy